My previous post about authenticity made me think about something.
I think about this a lot, honestly, but it always flutters away as the day goes on and there’s not much more to it.
But since I’m here, in a blogging kind of mood, I figured why not….
I love my friends, I truly do, they’re like family to me and, in a lot of ways, have been there for me in more ways than family ever has or could. I find it strange then that so much about my friendships weirds me out. I have people that I’m friends with that it’s like I woke up one day and we were close. Out of nowhere, without warning, rhyme or reason, we were just close. And that honestly creeps me out a little bit. I think it’s silly that I have such a love for understanding things that I let something like that weird me out, but I do and it does.
I very seldom remember how I met people and the friendships I have with no memory of meeting them, but I woke up one day and I was important to them and they were important to me weird me out the most. Like… Why?? Why did I feel compelled to be there for that person, why were they there for me? How did I come to mean so much to them? I feel like I’m just floating around in my own little world, smiling at everything for no good reason and then **poof** I matter to somebody.
Yeah, I know it’s dumb to question it, i was definitely told so when I said this out loud for the first time ever recently. But somehow it’s strange to me and i find myself fighting it. Hmm… At least I can honestly say that’s what I’m doing… Being in denial about it would make it worse and difficult to resolve… But that’s where I am. Tomorrow it can certainly change; I’m all about learning and growing as much as possible. But that totally weirds me out…. And i wonder what I need to do to get over it… There’s nothing wrong with having really good friends that just popped up out of nowhere, right???